I know I woke up this morning feeling more safe and secure living in America then I have for a long time. All thanks to those hard working employees of Department of Homeland Insecurity. Why you are asking yourself? Because the streets are safe from illegal hairdryers! There is more that our government (?) in Washington has done to make the United States, and possibly the entire world safer.
All praise be to Allah!
The federal government apparently has eradicated the illegal immigration that cripples America. It has eliminated the staggering unemployment that has brought so much misery to so many families. And, apparently, it has erased the suffocating debt and added enough spunk to the economy that it no longer needs all of those little tax dollars that small businesses provide.
That is why the federal government has so much time these days for fine-tuning our society in ways that might seem frivolous if we didn’t have so much patience and extra money lying around.
Just last week, the Department of Homeland Security proudly announced that federal agents had stopped 13,000 “dangerous hair dryers” at the border. The department issued a press release to highlight this daring, successful mission and to remind us how lucky we are to have such diligent protection of our sacred borders.
That’s right, 11 million illegals streaming over the Mexican border and what is our federal government hellbent after? Faulty hair dryers. And they’re even patting themselves on the back for it.